Dovetail: I am Hell on Earth - Chapter Six

This is the place to recount your superheroic deeds for all to gaze upon with astonishment and wonder.
Cosmic Entity
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Re: Dovetail: I am Hell on Earth - Chapter Six

Post by ClassDunce » Tue Aug 14, 2012 12:40 pm

Shock wrote:An implausible escape, but not by comic book standards. Good action!
It was kind of awkward to write. It's been outlined for weeks but the hard part was writing it so that the only characters that get knocked around, or embarrassed, at all were mine. Otakumon is Kaisius's character and it was already weird enough writing dialogue for him. He did make the biggest hit in the fight and that hit from the Samurai Linebacker is going to stick with Susan throughout the rest of the story. I think for a quick scuffle where Susan is completely outgunned everyone came out with their dignity intact.

The escape was originally more detailed. Lets just say that Susan is out five thousand dollars and is currently sneaking across a few roof tops to make it to the end of the block. It just slowed down the pacing a little too much for what I wanted and I honestly preferred the quick comedy beat of Sea-King and Otakumon there at the end. *Shrug*
"When they ask how I died, tell them: still angry." - Quellcrist Falconer

Cosmic Scion
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Re: Dovetail: I am Hell on Earth - Chapter Six

Post by catsi563 » Wed Aug 29, 2012 2:25 am

Which I thought was hilarious by the by.

and you did fine writing the characters also. i think your able to capture the spirirt of the others characters no problems. its why i have no issues if any of mine show up since im confident youve got the skill to write them appropriately.
Dr. Silverback has wryly observed that this is like trying to teach lolcats about Shakespeare

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Re: Dovetail: I am Hell on Earth - Chapter Six

Post by Spectrum » Mon May 27, 2013 6:24 pm

Great story CD. It's especially interesting in light of our current adventure in the Tattoo-verse. I'm only reading it now but sorry to see that it suddenly ended.